There are days I feel doubt creeping in then I feel the Holy Spirit whisper.... CHILD-LIKE FAITH is all you need Carlee!
Sometimes I think maybe we got it wrong? But then I read my bible and the scriptures God has given us. We feel God sees this as important. There is NO DOUBT about that!!
Defend the weak and the fatherless; uphold the cause of the poor and the oppressed.
Whoever shuts their ears to the cry of the poor will also cry out and not be answered
Matthew 25:45
.“He will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.’
How can I doubt God’s heart and what he wants us to do for the least of these?! I quite often think we can over think and complicate things when it’s really SO CLEAR!! Isn’t it?!
To be honest the timing financially couldn’t be any worse for us! So even in that it’s just been obedient to what we feel God is saying even when our human minds just don’t see how? It all seems so crazy and impossible. But with God all things are possible aren’t they?! FAITH IS BELIEVING THAT WHICH I CANNOT SEE YET!!!! People can be so negative and say some things that shock us. Others asking have you got the money? tickets? No we haven’t but we have booked them as a total step of FAITH!!! Hayden and I sometimes just have to laugh because it all does seem CRAZY!!! But you know what I think? This is totally where God wants us having to TRUST and RELY on Him and not on ourselves. We can only do so much in our own strength then we have to just let it all go and lay it down and let God do His thing. I kinda LOVE that in a way because it’s totally out of our control!!!!! Right where I feel God wants us.
Stepping out in total Faith can make you feel so many things! One min I’m excited, I’m scared, I believe, I don’t, I am overwhelmed, I am grateful, I’m questioning, I’m trusting, I have child-like faith I don’t!!! ....I could go on lol!! But you know there is no other place I would rather be right now. I have no idea what is really going to happen and the timing and if we got it wrong but I felt the Holy spirit say the other day as I was praying about it, He said I WILL NOT BE MOCKED!!! It was so clear and I was like WOW!!!
I am learning so much and you know we only do what we feel God wants us to do. It isn’t all easy and it may not all make sense at all to us, the timing etc... But I would rather try and even make a fool of myself or fail than to have never tried or learnt to step out in total blind FAITH to go serve the beautiful people of Uganda. To be honest I am no one special I believe God has called us all to go and serve the broken dying people of this world. Whether that may be short term or long term. To be their voice to speak out on their behalf, to let them know we care we love them and most importantly they are NOT FORGOTTEN!!!!! LOVE in ACTION!!!!
I read this amazing book I would highly recommend called Radical by David Platt which turned our world upside down and inside out!!! There was a lil story in there that really spoke to me.
I have lent out my book so this is by memory.
Well David was about to go on a mission trip to some African nation. It was going to cost him about $3000 all up. This dear lil lady came up to him at church and said couldn’t that money be better spent? Wouldn’t sending the $3000 over to them be more sensible? David really started thinking maybe she’s right? But he felt God wanted him to go. When he was there he was sitting down with a Christian brother from this African nation, who had endured so much, there had been war raging for many years and famines and so many more heart breaking things. He started to share it all with David. Then he said something to David that he will never forget. He looked at David with tears in his eyes and said thank you for coming! He said we had so much aid and money sent to help us. We are so grateful but for you to come at your own risk to come and sit with me that’s a true Christian brother. To hear our stories and take them back. I KNOW!!! this HIT me hard and got me thinking about so much. Didn’t God say GO!?
We get so hang up on the money sometimes that we forget what God said. I do know we all can’t physically go but we can help others GO. I don’t think all the world’s problems we can just throw money at and think we have done our bit. I know God asks so much more of us and the sooner we realise it the more we can change the world together.
Hayden and I have been at a place we cannot ignore this any longer. So here we are stepping out in total blind FAITH!!! I’ve been thinking of things I may see in Uganda and wonder how my heart will cope?
I feel I’m about to break in a whole new way. What I will hear, what I will see, what I will smell, and touch. But most of all I think I will grieve for what I cannot change!
I lay awake at night asking for God to give me the strength I will need to be His hands and feet. There will people I will have to walk away from and leave them still living in their heart smashing situations but I can be Jesus to them. LOVE in action!!!
As much I have read and watched and heard I don’t think I will ever be fully ready for that which I am about to walk into. I have dreamt of this for so long. I said to Hayden I won’t believe it until we are on the plane in the air lol. I think as my feet touch the Ugandan soil I think I will never ever be the same again! The land of beautiful people who have and are enduring through so much!!!
We cannot fix everything but we can do something. RIGHT?!
Through this journey God has been reminding me of my mission trip to Hong Kong and China when I was 14. It was a life changing experience that impacted me forever. I remember this missions trip been announced and straight away I felt I was to go. I told mum and dad they were so supportive but they said they didn’t have the money. Been a pastors kid back then we lived on a smell of an oily rag lol!!! That did not change my heart at all! I was like that’s cool. I had such a bold CHILD-LIKE FAITH!!! God had given me an amazing verse and I just believed it and that was that!!!! I loved the Faith I had looking back. I told everyone at school I was going and all my friends. It came down to the last day to pay the tickets but I still believed!!! My parents went down to the travel shop with the rest of the team and they came back and said guess what?! My ticket had already been paid for. Yes! I was so excited but I was like I knew God would come through because he told me to GO!!! WOW!!!
This mission trip birthed in me an even greater heart for missions. What I saw and experienced was pretty massive for a lil girl living in a lil country town. I remember flying out and I started crying and my mum saying Carlee what’s wrong? I said I don’t want to leave! There’s is so much to do and too many people in so much need!! How can we leave? It hit me so hard.
So I am aware it won’t be all pretty and amazing I am under no illusions at all. It will be hard but we are willing to GO. One of the hardest parts for me will be leaving when once again the need is so great. But I will be hanging out to see my kids. I have never been away for them for this long. But this is all part of it the sacrifice. God has called us to a life of sacrifice and I know my kids will be well looked after and will be fine they will have food, water, shelter and love. Yes we will miss each other dearly but they know we will be coming home. We will meet so many children that don’t know where their next meal will come from, that do not have access to clean water no family, parents or shelter or a place to call home. So kinda puts it all in perspective aye.
Last Sunday as we were getting ready for church my lil Sadie said I wish rain was money, as it had been raining. We said whys that hun and she said because then we could go to Uganda with all that money and help the people. LOVE her heart!!!!! I to wish it was that easy!!! But we are teaching our kids it’s not the money we rely on its GOD!!!!
1 John 3:18
18 Dear children, don't just talk about love. Put your love into action. Then it will truly be love
